So here I am, week 3 into being a stay at home mom. I am truly loving every minute... but the sting of being laid off from my "dream job" turned circus show still burned a little.
After Taylor was born, I was so sad to have to return to work, but did enjoy the lifestyle my income allowed us. Little did I know, the lifestyle and money just weren't what I was looking for! I missed my daughter. I missed her so much it hurt. But, we kept convincing ourselves that we just couldn't afford for me to not work. I had changed jobs three times since she was born in effort to find a job that made me happy enough to be away from her for 10 hours a day. Apparently, no such job existed. The first week in January, I was laid off from my "dream job" in Human Resources... while it really wasn't my dream job, I made myself think it eventually could be. When I got the call from my recruiter telling me that I left my cushy government job with almost 3 weeks paid vacation and 12k more a year it was for absolutely no good reason, because the company I was with couldn't afford me... I was crushed... for about an hour. And then I realized, HELLLLLOOOO blessing in disguise much?
To be honest, part of the reason I never forced the whole, being a stay at home mom terrified me. I just wasn't sure I could do it! I always wanted to be a mom, but felt I didn't have the personality or maturity to handle it. I was worried I would be bored, and not very good at it.
Well, here I am - 3 weeks in... and I feel so incredibly connected to my daughter! I feel like I never really got to know her until now - which is extremely sad considering she is 17 1/2 months old!! I feel like I have lost so much time with her... and for what? After we got the call saying I was no longer employed, my husband and I sat down to look at the numbers. Apparently I didn't really need to work. He makes enough to pay the bills. We looked at shortcuts we could take... he had already totalled my brand new $400 bucks a month car in September last year, so that was kind of a bizarre and terrifying blessing in disguise. We figured out that I could drive him every day to the park in ride 15 minutes from our house... that would save us a fortune in gas and parking costs! Plus, I wouldn't be doing the corporate world thing of eating out, doing happy hours, stopping at Starbucks 4 of the 5 days a week... (ok, the starbucks thing hasn't changed much, but we all have our vices). Between our shortcuts, my commitment to cook dinner every night (or at least like 27 of the 30 days a month) and no longer paying 800 bucks a month for daycare... we realized we were actually saving money by me not working!! Plus, I still had like $2000 worth of Slumber Parties stuff in our basement... I could really focus on that and bring home some extra money. This was finally the opportunity we were looking for. Plus, we had been trying to get pregnant for several months now, this was the right time to settle down and focus on giving Taylor a forever friend/playmate! So after about 2 hours of going back and forth (and about a 5 hour game night with my in laws) we happily went to bed knowing the path we were about to go down was for the best. It wasn't going to be easy... it would be the hardest time we have had since we have been together... we knew this... but 3 weeks in, I can tell you, I don't miss my lunch dates or happy hours one bit! Ok, maybe the happy hours...but find me one stay at home mom who couldn't use a happy hour!?
Instead of focusing on Human Resources, I am watching Human development! Its amazing! My kid is amazing! Seriously... the girl is so bright! Don't believe me? Ask your 17 month old what a cow, cat, horse, rooster, piggy, lion, and duck say and see what they do! :0) I taught her all that in week one of being at home.
So what are my biggest challenges thus far? Not getting to sit on the couch and eat milk duds all day for one! :0) I thought this was going to be a breeze! I figured, I play with her for a few hours, feed her, put her down for a 3 hour nap - watch Desperate Housewives maybe do a load of laundry, catch up on facebook, and then when she was up from her nap, play with her, feed her, play some more, and then go pick up daddy... Um yeah, not so much! In the corporate world, you can goof around because you know what has to be done and when, you have deadlines, time frames... u know when u go to lunch, you know when u get off... u can take your breaks to chat with your cubie mate whenever you want. Now, my days are spent, waking up, dragging my half groggy, super cute pj cladded munchkin to the park in ride to drop off daddy... breakfast is typically in the car for the most part, as she is too hungry to wait until we get home (good thing Mike totalled my car and not his... I would have a heart attack if my car looked as messy as his does... I mean really... banana on the seat... Come on 1 year old, focus! JK). Once we do get home, its actual breakfast time, or an attempt at it (apparently my child has created an aversion to eating in the high chair)... and then I cave and chase her around with Oatmeal and Yogurt (foods I adamantly REFUSE to allow her to eat in the car) We play, read, dance, run, scream, typically cry a few times, and then go down for our nap. If I am lucky, she stays down for 2.5 MAYBE 3 hours, but on average after 1.5 to 2 hours the girl is up and ready! That means I get to either take a five minute shower, throw some gel and mousse in my curly hair and call it a day while I am doing five loads of laundry, cleaning up after the tiny terror tornado that blasted thru my house, start my lunch, and MAYBE, JUST MAYBE send out some emails for my Slumber Party hostess'. Rarely do I even get to find the remote control to turn on Desperate Housewives. And since I am so active and too busy to eat, I refuse to eat bon bons... just sayin....
Last week I was planning a huge party at our house for my kick off Slumber Parties Party, and I spent 2 days straight deep cleaning my house.... cleaned the upholstery, deep cleaned the carpets, kitchen, bathrooms... This evening my husband comes home to a somewhat torpedoed house, and says to me... wow, the carpet is such a mess... I look down... I see apple chunks from this afternoon, 6 different pairs of socks, a few tissues, and blocks all over my floor... DIDNT I JUST VACUUM????!!!!!!! Literally, two days ago my floor was sparkling clean... and today... well... today it looked like a teeny tiny tornado torpedoed my home! So, after dinner, I sat down, with a glass of wine and thought... that'd be an excellent blog title.....
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